Category: Columnists

• Life After Graduation

  November 3, 2020 11:59 am Comments Off on Life After Graduation

  As the silver poplars spread fluff all over campus, it’s time again to study for exams and begin reflecting on the year. For me, this time is different, as next year is not just another repeat of the various undergraduate courses one can take to form a degree. A recipient of this week’s invitation to graduate, I have joined the ranks of undergrads only weeks away from finishing what my parents described to me as ‘the most enjoyable period of my life’. 
  While I wonder about the many significant periods of life that I would expect my parents to rank as the most enjoyable (their relationship, my birth, possibly my brother’s birth), I understand the point they were trying to convey. Unless you have come out of ANU with a Chancellor’s Medal, your undergrad is probably the most momentous yet least serious period of your life. It is an amalgamation of novel life experiences in a short period of time, rivalled by few other stages in your life. Living away from home for the first time, beginning adult friendships, starting (and ending) long-term relationships, finding lifelong passions, and finally getting a full-time job (for those so lucky) are all compacted into a 3 to 5 year period. 
  And whilst these experiences come thick and fast, it doesn’t seem as if there is a corresponding weight to them. They are continuously interspersed with the ridiculous aspects of student life. Why save going out for the weekend when you can have it two days earlier on a Thursday? Why wake up at 6 am when you can rise late and sleep even later? Why live in an abode suiting of your upbringing when you can live as three men, one Corroborree? 
  The relative inconsequentiality of my student life has left me in an awkward position. Graduation has been the final stop to the degree that I never thought would end. They say that numerous Olympic gold medallists find themselves on the podium only to settle into a depression as they realise the finality of their position. I am neither an Olympian nor about to settle into a depression, but graduating feels as if I am attempting to square the circle of a seemingly never-ending university experience.
  There are some things about graduating now that I appreciate. Never one for theatrics, I’m glad that the American-style mass graduations have been halted for the time being. I’ll take my degree in the mail and celebrate how I deem fit. Further, ANU feels like a sinking ship with multiple programs being scrapped and valuable long-term employees being made redundant. As one of the lucky current students who has only had to spend one year learning in his bedroom, I can look back at the golden era of in-person tutorials and workshops. 
  Adieu, ANU.
   
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Eammon Gumley

• What I Think About When I Can’t Sleep

  October 28, 2020 9:10 am Comments Off on What I Think About When I Can’t Sleep

  1:47 am – Should I get up and have an icy pole? Or maybe some Ribena. But that might make it harder to fall asleep later.
  1:50 am – Who else is awake right now? 
  1:57 am – Should I go wake someone up to keep me company? Not Mum because she has work the next day. Maybe Michelle. I could get her to cuddle me.
  2:09 am – Should I start an aesthetic Instagram where I write these sleepless thoughts down? Mix of Rupi Kaur meets minimalist chic. Colour palette – to be determined. 
  2:23 am – You should watch your lecture tomorrow morning. First thing. Aditya will not be impressed in Friday’s tutorial if not.
  2:29 am – If I watch another episode of New Girl will that make me more awake? Doesn’t something happen to your brain when you look at a screen? Maybe one episode will get me tired. Or two. If I drink the Ribena I can watch three. 
  2:35 am – Goes downstairs to make a glass of Ribena and grabs an icy pole. Watches three episodes of New Girl.
  3:41 am – I need one of those weighted blankets. Everyone in Architectural Digest’s Open Door series has one. They’re probably really expensive. Am I just one of those plebs who celebrities can sell just about anything to?
  3:56 am – Wow, these thoughts are really deep. You’re a genius. You should write this all down and turn it into a series of essays. You can be the next Anne Boyer.
  4:02 am – If you write your thoughts down with a nice pen, does that make you feel more confident in their quality?
  4:08 am – Why do we get lost in the aesthetics of writing? 
  4:15 am – Hey this would make a really good Woroni article. 
  4:17 am – Finally falls asleep.
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Queenie Ung-Lam

• Is Residential College Worth It?

  October 21, 2020 5:11 pm Comments Off on Is Residential College Worth It?

  For interstate and international undergraduate students, attending one of the many Daley Road residential colleges (and Fenner) is a standard beginning of the ANU experience. Coming from places other than Canberra and finding a sharehouse without personal contacts can be a daunting and seemingly impossible task. Colleges are the perfect yet expensive solution to this dilemma for ANU’s nomadic student population.  
  The social aspect of colleges is their biggest selling point. Coming to Canberra with only one point of social contact, I found that a group of friends can be fully formed before the end of O-Week, and the vast majority of these friendships can define the rest of your university experience. Whether that is worth $20,000 is debatable, but other than ANU clubs there is little ability for the average student to set themselves up with a social circle within 24 hours of arriving in the capital. 
  It is both true and a caricature that ANU colleges differ in experience. All are hard drinking, attract both public and private school students, and all have their fair share of scandals. There are points of difference between them, with Burgmann focusing on the PPE-Law combination and Johns focusing on sporty types. They are also at the time of writing the only two independent colleges, with the rest owned by ANU. 
  Pricewise, the ANU has previously ranked highly nationally in its affordability, but as with most things, that era seems to have ended. When I started at ANU, the price for fully catered colleges on a 40-week contract sat at under $20,000. This meant that a student on government assistance with a few shifts a week could just about afford a rental contract. ANU colleges also offer a fraction of the networks and century old buildings that the Sydney and Melbourne colleges build their frankly ridiculous $40,000 plus a year residential contracts on. Student residence fees have only climbed since then, and it wouldn’t surprise me if Sydney and Melbourne colleges are now considered better value than ANU colleges. 
  Looking overseas, slightly different residential systems prevail among countries with similar university systems. The United Kingdom has a scaled back and more reserved system, throwing new students into large dormitories with hundreds of students. Without the individualistic cultures of the Australian system’s tighter-knit colleges, UK students typically stay for about a year. The United States has the most foreign system, with students expected to room with a peer in large dormitories for at least 2 years. 
  Colleges at ANU are an invaluable social asset that allow the interstate student population to build social networks with reasonable ease. If the current trend of rising prices without providing a corresponding benefit continues, they will become both unaffordable and lacklustre value for money. The colleges must realise that their value and lower-than-average prices provide the ANU with  a competitive advantage. Otherwise, students will go elsewhere and be poorer for it.
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.
   
   
   

  Eammon Gumley

• Danger Trips and Exotic Holidays

  October 15, 2020 10:54 am Comments Off on Danger Trips and Exotic Holidays

  I know it’s only been seven months since Australians were banned from international travel, but I’m hoping that I’m not the only one who has already planned multiple future trips overseas. The current hiatus of international adventure leads me to reminisce about the good old days of $300 to Japan, and contemplate the trips I am yet to embark upon. To assist in my own and others’ trip planning, I’ve boiled down the types of university travel to a few staples; the group trip, ANU tours, and the danger trip. 
  The group trip is the simplest of the travel plans, mixing shoestring budgets with relatively new uni mates. Falling around the breaks in second or third year of uni, this trip centres on Europe or South East Asia, hostels, and copious amounts of beer. Always better in plan than execution, these trips can be the make or break for relatively new uni friendships. Travellers come back either stronger mates or no longer any mates at all. Unfortunately, the future of these trips is in doubt, with the late Tiger Airlines resting in its grave and the price of future travel only increasing as tourism stagnates. 
  ANU tours are the best mix of university and travel. With the university offering field courses and intensive language courses to countries like Jordan and Myanmar, what student wouldn’t want to HECS a holiday while taking home at least six course credit units. Having been on the intensive Arabic language trip to Jordan in 2018, I can’t recommend ANU overseas study more. However, there are some caveats. For a more independent spirit, ANU’s appropriate behaviour contract is a hard document to sign, and activities like bungee jumping or a brief trip to see the Syrian border are off limits. For the introverted, months of living with fellow students does begin to grind. Ever optimistic, Global Programs has opened applications for exchange in second semester 2021, but I’ll believe it when I see it, given that the Federal Government refuses to put a date on the reopening of international travel.
  The danger trip is a must-do for the adventurous university traveller. Among the potentially perilous destinations are the populous and nuclear-armed Pakistan, the fan favourite North Korea, and Tajikistan, often called the ‘North Korea of the Stans’. Favourite features of a danger trip include an Australian Government ‘Do Not Travel’ status, higher risks of imprisonment, and a unique experience far from the usual Contiki Tour. Call it ironic, but there is a certain paradox to freely travelling to a dangerous state such as North Korea and voluntarily subjecting yourself to the state-enforced repressive social and political environment. Skipping the ethical considerations around visiting repressive states, the danger trip mixes youthful feelings of invincibility with the ability to see gems in these countries that only a handful of other travellers have seen.
  If this doesn’t excite your inner traveller, then Australia also has much to offer. With a promised renaissance of internal travel in Australia once the state borders reopen, there is more than enough Australiana to go around. We simply may have to swap North Korea for Norfolk Island. 
   
   
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.
   

  Eammon Gumley

• ‘Brüno’: Ten Years On

  October 5, 2020 5:17 pm Comments Off on ‘Brüno’: Ten Years On

  Sitting down in the living room for dinner earlier this week, my housemates and I found ourselves watching Sacha Baron Cohen’s 2009 hit Brüno. Subjecting ourselves to the full two hours of the mockumentary, it became pretty obvious that we had chosen the wrong movie to eat a meal to. Having not seen the film since I was 13, I found that the movie had a lasting impact through the week, laughing hours later as I thought of scenes in the film. 
  How Cohen gets away with returning to the US is beyond me. I get that the US is a large country, but Cohen seems to return over and over to play slightly different eccentric and outrageous characters with little to no recognition among the audience of his true persona. Granted, we never see the shots that didn’t make the cut in which he could have been recognised, but that fact that Cohen was able to obtain two hours of footage in which people believed he was a queer Austrian fashion designer amazes me. 
  I can’t help but think that Cohen keeps returning to the US because of the extreme reactions, international intrigue with the country, and the willingness of Americans to accept his characters on face value. I find the last reason to be slightly endearing to Americans. While it has led to their embarrassment and humiliation many times in the film, it’s obvious that most of the audience and victims of Cohen’s pranks are led into his trap due to their naivety rather than any sort of ill will. Of course, this is not always true, and the extreme attitudes Cohen captured from gay conversion therapists and the memorable ‘Straight Dave’s Man Slamming Maxout’ presented a horrendous side of America’s cultural intolerances.
  Has Brüno aged well? Having last watched it nearly a decade ago, I found that the film was just as funny, if not funnier this time around. I have a different sense of humour from most and I understand that some, if not most people, would find the movie vulgar, offensive, and distasteful. This is not the sort of movie that I would recommend to my parents. Even with his ironic intent, others may find Cohen’s impression of homosexuality offensive, and Central Europeans (mostly Austrians) could take issue with his characterisation of their country and culture. 
  Regardless, the film remains neutral, neither getting better nor worse with age. The criticisms above are exactly the same as the criticism the film received in 2009, and it intentionally promotes controversy then and now. Its commentary regarding American attitudes towards issues like race and homosexuality are still significant today, especially as American society seems to be breaking down on many of the fault lines Cohen explores in the film. 
   
   

  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Eammon Gumley

• What Does RBG’s Death Mean for US Politics?

  September 24, 2020 8:27 am Comments Off on What Does RBG’s Death Mean for US Politics?

  For those of us across the pond, American politics is a passionate, divisive, and often bizarre spectacle. The death of Supreme Court Associate Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg shocked the world, not only because of the loss of a civil rights icon and her inspirational legal career, but also because of its political and legal consequences. A vacant seat on the most significant legal body in the United States has added another potential prize into an election that many Americans see either as an opportunity to return to normality or an opportunity to strengthen Trump’s presidency. 
  The theatrics (Senator Cory Booker’s comparison of himself to Spartacus) and moral quandaries (the ethics regarding allegations of the past criminal misconduct in judicial appointments) of Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s Senate hearing is still fresh in my mind. Given Trump’s promise to appoint a female Justice with just over 40 days to go before the election, I expect the oncoming hearings to be just as extraordinary as the last. For those of you who don’t fully understand the approaching political drama about to play out in the Senate and on the campaign trail, I have attempted to outline the many positions of Republicans and Democrats towards Trump’s attempt to appoint a third justice.
  President Trump and Senate Republicans are faced with an unprecedented opportunity to appoint three Supreme Court justices in nearly the same amount of years. Bearing in mind that justices serve until death (such as Ginsburg or Scalia), Trump could be able to appoint a third of the Supreme Court for the next 30 years. President Trump has been quick to act, and his nominee is expected to be announced in the next few days.
  Senate Republicans are faced with a dilemma between further shifting the political alignment of the court in their favour or retaining a precedent that if broken could politically damage their image in their constituencies. Senate Republicans were vocal about establishing a precedent in 2016 when they denied President Obama the ability to appoint Merrick Garland to the Supreme Court. Ostensibly, the precedent was established over concerns about the mandate of the President and the Senate in an election year. 
  The current chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, Lindsey Graham, has previously stated on the record that he is in favor of retaining the precedent and multiple Republican Senators have pledged not to vote in favour of Trump’s appointee. Many of the Senators are up for reelection and are campaigning against well-funded Democrats that will take every advantage of a reversal in position on such an important issue. 
  For those worried or elated about the prospect of a conservative court, the political position of the court is less than straightforward. The appointment of a justice does not necessarily mean that Republican party policies will gain further legal legitimacy, or that the court will move from its currently moderately conservative position. While some justices are more ‘conservative’ than others, ‘conservative’ jurisprudence is vastly different from political conservatism and relates more to justices’ interpretations of the Constitution. While Brett Kavanaugh is regarded as a moderately ‘conservative’ Justice, he has sided with ‘liberal’ Justices Breyer and Kagan to the same degree that he has sided with Trump’s ‘conservative’ pick Justice Neil Gorsuch. 
  Ginsburg’s death presents a real test of the precedent, and it is likely that the primary challenge of the oncoming confirmation process will boil down to the payoffs for elected officials between a chance of a more conservative leaning court or retaining the precedent. It is likely that the appointment process will be impeded in the Senate hearing stage as Democrats attempt to stall the process and Republicans iron out their positions on the appointment. For us in Australia, it means another political cage match from a country that can’t seem to have enough of them.
   
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Eammon Gumley

• Platitudes, Pessimism, and the Future of Millennials

  September 11, 2020 8:00 am Comments Off on Platitudes, Pessimism, and the Future of Millennials

  Often labelled the most ungrateful and aggrieved generation, 2020 has given the current crop of university students more than enough to complain about. I am often a critic of student pessimism, but this year has made me believe that our generation is actually onto something. With the price of degrees set to increase, online courses, and a graduate job market turned sour, it is worth taking a look at the current and future changes that face this generation of university students.
  Relatively shielded from the turmoil of the world, Australian students like me are facing unique issues. As the price of a future humanities degree skyrockets nation-wide, at least we at the ANU can take consolation that our degrees will still be the best degree in the country for all that’s worth ($50,000+). For the rest of us lucky enough to enjoy the current rate of course payment, ANU has shifted to what appears to be a semi-permanent online learning approach. Out are the days of CASS and CBE courses with multiple tutors, large lecture theatres, and the prospect of meeting new people. In are online courses with reduced or no tutors and guaranteed technical issues. 
  Call me conspiratorial, but part of me believes that the online approach is a ploy to decrease the value of our courses to the point where future students will be begging to pay double for the full in-person experience. While I’m not on my knees yet, I’m also not one of the many future students faced with an ANU experience that begins and ends in the confines of my own house.
  However, once our degree turns up in the mail, the future as a graduate looks just as bright as the bedroom lamp that lit up most of my fourth-year studies. As firms shutter their internship and graduate programs, graduates in Canberra are being herded into a virtual hunger games for APS jobs. With thousands of applicants with similar ANU double degree credentials, it’s a harsh introduction into the post-university world. 
  Not to worry, as there are always the non-Commonwealth supported ANU master’s programs that allow us to buy another year at the meagre cost of thousands of dollars up-front. 
  And for those of us who hoped to expand their horizons with a grad job overseas, Australia’s status as the only country that isn’t allowing its citizens to leave has finished off that prospect. I guess we can sleep tight knowing that COVID-19 is under control, with the notable exceptions of Victoria, NSW, and Queensland.  
  A constant platitude from the generations before us is that we should remain positive, given that they ‘managed’. If the last few paragraphs are any guide, the social and economic outlook remains pessimistic. With my focus set on the future, I can only remark that if current and future students manage to navigate the uncertain future set out ahead of us, it will be us that can really claim that we ‘managed’. 
   
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Eammon Gumley

• In Complete Opposition to ScoMo’s ‘Exclusion-For-Failure’ Policy

  September 4, 2020 4:45 pm Comments Off on In Complete Opposition to ScoMo’s ‘Exclusion-For-Failure’ Policy

  Content Warning: institutional betrayal, sexual assault and sexual harassment.
   
  The Morrison government has proposed another education policy that unduly impacts students. ScoMo, is there no end to your policy that treats education as an economic transaction instead of one which fosters the learning and growth of Australian youth? The proposal of the ‘exclusion-for-failure’ policy (as termed by fellow columnist Eammon Gummley) reveals that we cannot hope too much. 
   
  The exclusion-for-failure policy will legislate to exclude students who have failed half of their subjects in first year from the HECS-HELP and FEE-HELP government education loan systems. Such a policy is aimed to reduce a debt cycle that is footed by taxpayers. It also serves to satisfy the notion that taxpayer money should contribute to a public good. Failing students, instead of being the boon to society as one would hope from a youth population gaining tertiary education, paint a rather dire picture of frivolous youths squandering their opportunities alongside taxpayer money. Not a sight that the Morrison government wants to be seen endorsing. 
   
  One key point made in opposition to this policy is that it will unfairly impact students with valid reasons for failing their courses. Crucial to consider nonetheless is that the legislation itself explicitly details the individual university’s ability to give out exemptions. This caveat is supposed to account for students being affected by mental health, disability or other adverse factors to their studies. However, in bestowing the power of the university to define what constitutes an ‘adverse factor’ and its merit in justifying a ‘fair failure’, the government places undue and perhaps, naive faith in university institutions. When it comes to listening to students and being understanding of their issues, universities are better known within the student body to be dismissive or to superficially pursue action instead of instigating systematic and cultural betterment. 
   
  If the Government policy provides no process for its standardisation across universities, nor a Code of Conduct in the assessment of a ‘fair failure’, then it does little to protect students against institutional failure and betrayal. That in itself, is the key issue. There is no transparency in this policy that details how students will be assessed on their ability to gain exemption from a failure. The government has pawned off this process to individual universities. Yet without a government sanctioned standard, there is little to hold the university accountable to treating students in a fair, empathetic and inclusive manner. 
   
  The point was raised that as ANU wishes to keep its students, there is hope that the institution will tighten Access & Inclusion to be more accessible to students applying for special considerations and possibly, exemptions from failure. I wish we could confidently place such faith in the institution. However, three years of inaction on sexual assault and sexual harassment policy, the lack of student mental health services despite long waiting lists and using students in colleges as cash cows to pay off Kambri throws into serious doubt whose interests the ANU chooses to protect. Even when it comes at the expense of student anger and in some cases, decisions to leave the ANU, our university has done little to increase transparency of its practices or listen to student demands. 
   
  The truth with policies like this is that it is always students who pay the price for institutional failure and betrayal. In this case, quite literally so.
   
  You can read the other side of the argument here.
   
   
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Queenie Ung-Lam

• In (Partial) Defence of ScoMo’s ‘Exclusion-For-Failure’ Policy

  9:12 am Comments Off on In (Partial) Defence of ScoMo’s ‘Exclusion-For-Failure’ Policy

  Browsing Schmidtposting, it has come to my attention that the Morrison Government’s education reforms are unpopular to say the least. Attending at a strongly humanities-based university that would see a large number of students paying double the current rates, I can’t say I’m surprised. What surprises me is the rapid dismissal of the policy aiming to remove loan access to students who have failed half their courses, which I am going to call the ‘exclusion-for-failure’ policy.
  Before I zero in on the policy, it’s worth quickly addressing that I share the disagreement towards the majority of the education reforms currently being pushed by the Morrison government. I am aware that increasing the price of humanities courses is unfair, heightens the bar of accessibility, and would have doubled my current HECS debt. My issue is with the lack of two-sided debate for a policy that addresses an obvious problem with the loan system and strengthens the political survivability of subsidised education in Australia. It isn’t ‘anti-student’ as some claim, nor is it excessively harsh or cruel.
  The exclusion-for-failure policy currently proposed by the government aims to legislate for the exclusion of students from the HECS-HELP and FEE-HELP education loan systems if they have failed 50% of their subjects in first year. This works out to failing at least 4 of their first 8 units, with a unit representing a course. The policy is clear in only applying to failures that I would call a ‘fair failure’. This is a failure in which a student failed to meet the requirements of the course and was not unfairly impacted by adverse circumstances like mental health or a range of other factors.
  The policy is driven by the mechanism under which the HECS-HELP/FEE-HELP loan system works. The Australian Government (and us as future taxpayers) footing the payment of the interest rate for student loans means that we avoid the crippling debt cycle that leads to a 10% default rate typical of the US student loan system. This is not a system to be sneered at, as it protects us from the highly varied interest rates of the last few decades and the nightmare of compound interest. But our right to subsidised and accessible further education is not unlimited and brings with it certain expectations. Primary among them is the expectation that taxpayer’s funds are contributing to the promotion of a public good, which a highly educated populace undoubtedly brings. 
  However, excessive and unwarranted failing undermines this calculation and brings perilous political attention to the system. Students who ‘fairly’ fail more than half of their courses (at the end of first year or at any stage afterwards) represent added costs to the taxpayer without the corresponding levels of benefit that significantly add to the aggregate level of education in society. 
  Approaching the issue from another perspective, a lack of an exclusion-for-failure provision undermines the current and future government’s ability to justify the loan system to an increasingly sceptical taxpayer. As a simplification of the point, attempting to sell an inner-city teenager’s right to fail half their courses to a middle-aged rural taxpayer with no tertiary background is difficult to sell. 
  A couple of points have been made in opposition to the legislation. The President of the National Union of Students (NUS) accused the government of attempting to incentivise success with the punishment of being cut off from the loan system. This is exactly the case. There have always been disincentives for failure that could also be seen as incentives for success. The exclusion-for-failure policy is no different from ANU’s probation and expulsion policy concerning excessive failure except that it universalises it among Australia’s tertiary institutions. 
  Another point is that the proposed legislation will unfairly impact students with valid issues that lead them to fail 50% of their courses. However, the legislation is explicit about the ability of universities to provide exemptions. While I am aware of the various problems ANU has with adequately providing exemptions, the policy incentivises universities to improve systems like Access & Inclusion as it is in their interest to retain as many students as possible. 
  If I may offer one criticism, it is the indefiniteness of the inability to access the loan schemes. Young adults make mistakes, and indefinite exclusion seems too harsh a punishment for what could’ve been six months of inattention to study. A year of exclusion conditional on a successful second attempt at education makes more sense, allowing former students to learn from their mistakes without messing up too much of their future. The combination of economic soundness, political prudence, and a sense of forgiveness would make the exclusion-for-failure policy a winner amongst the assortment of education policy that is anything but.
   
  You can read the other side of the argument here.
   
  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Eammon Gumley

• Some Advice on ANUSA Voting

  August 24, 2020 11:14 am Comments Off on Some Advice on ANUSA Voting

  Person A has invited you to like their ANUSA campaign page.
  Person B has changed their profile picture on Facebook to announce them running as a General Representative under Person A’s ticket.
  Person C is running as an independent and is sending out personalised policy recaps over Messenger.
  Person D is Person C’s best friend and is messaging you to advocate for Person C, both on Messenger and Instagram. They’re dedicated.
  Person E is you, thrust into the world of ANUSA elections, wondering what the hell a ticket is and why everyone’s profile pictures now all have the same filter. How do you even animate a profile picture?
   
  This is my third year experiencing the circus of electing the upcoming year’s ANUSA representatives and I’m ready to delve into some of the lessons that I’ve learnt:

   

  If you don’t feel equipped to vote, then don’t feel pressured into it. If you’re not invested in ANUSA, then that’s okay. If you don’t even know what an ANUSA representative is, then that’s fine. I was in my second year until I registered that the people stopping me in Kambri were ANUSA candidates and not pluggers trying to sign me up to Cancer Council donations.

   
  2. When you vote for a person, you don’t have to vote for their entire ticket. Each ANUSA representative is voted independent from their ticket. Think of a ticket as a good way to get publicity for yourself and your policy, but not like a political party.
   
  3. You don’t have to vote for every vacancy on ANUSA. You can pick and choose which positions you want to vote a candidate into. If you just want to vote for the President position, then you can do that. You want to just vote in a General Representative because they’re your friend? You do that.
   
  4. On that note, when you vote for a specific position, you don’t have to number your preferences for every candidate. Say there are four candidates for President, but you only want to vote for one person. You can number that person as your first preference and cast your ballot without numerating the remaining three.
   
  5. Don’t feel the need to like every campaign page that your Facebook friends invite you to. You’re allowed to keep your feed restricted to Proud Plants Canberra and Hummus Meme pages. (Have I revealed too much about my personal interests?)
   
  6. Voting is open for only a couple of days. This year it is open between 9am, 25th August to 12pm, the 28th of August. You can head to voteanusa.com during this time frame to cast your votes.
   
  7. ANUSA candidates who are serious, genuinely put passion and time into their policies. If you really want to educate yourself on the best person to vote for, take the time to read individual candidate’s policies to assess whether you want them to represent you.
   
  8. If you currently don’t have the brain capacity to read policies, you can also vote for the people with the prettiest Facebook profile picture filters and Instagram pages. Good marketing reflects their ability to advocate for students right?
   
   
   
   

  Think your name would look good in print? Woroni is always open for submissions. Email write@woroni.com.au with a pitch or draft. You can find more info on submitting here.

  Queenie Ung-Lam